Of course, we have to acknowledge that these don’t come without a cost. All of the following challenges can be overcome — and I’ll be sharing how to do that — but there are difficulties that we should be aware of:
- We’ll come up with reasons not to do it
- Resistance is real, and can be hard to work with!
- The ego will get in the way — not wanting to look bad in public, for example, or not wanting to not know how to do something
- We can get tired and want to give up after awhile
- We can white knuckle it and force our way through it, but not enjoy it
- Completing it can be about the ego as well, wanting to look good is a real danger
- On the other hand, the feeling of not being good enough can also be triggered
- When we get hit in the face by discomfort, we’ll get a strong urge to collapse
- We’ll find a lot of other activity to do instead
- Perfectionism can often come up and get in the way
- Our minds will complain a lot about it!
- We can also get to overwork, exhaustion, overdoing it
The Benefits of Hard Challenges
Why do this at all? Someone asked me that on Twitter yesterday: “What are you trying to prove, and who are you trying to prove it to?” I love that question!
With these hard challenges, I’m trying to prove that difficulty, discomfort, uncertainty, resistance and fear are nothing to fear. That we don’t have to run from things because they are hard or scary, or because we feel resistance.
Even further, I’m trying to prove that we can fall in love with discomfort and challenge, bring play and curiosity in the middle of uncertainty and fear, find joy in the middle of chaos and groundlessness.
Who am I trying to prove it to? Myself. And all of you. In service of doing something meaningful in the world.
Imagine that you have some meaningful work you’d like to do — write a book, grow a community, give a voice to others, support those in need, inspire, teach, serve. But with meaningful work comes uncertainty and discomfort, and these can hold us back, because we run from them. Why not just enjoy life and forget about my meaningful work? You can do that, and it would be great, but you can also do your meaningful work, and it can be awesome as well.
In addition to that … hard challenges are incredible! They can:
- Teach us that we can adapt to discomfort
- Show us the beauty of uncertainty and not knowing
- Help us find growth in failure and loss
- Prove that we have the courage to do what we fear
- Give ourselves evidence of our resilience, grit, determination, commitment
- Help us to grow in new and unexpected ways
- Show us what our patterns are when we feel discomfort & uncertainty — if we don’t challenge ourselves to do hard things, it’s almost impossible to see what our patterns are, except of course the avoidance of doing hard things
Each of you has done something hard, maybe many hard things: run a marathon, given birth, raised kids, completed hard projects, dealt with relationship or health difficulties, and much more. These are some of the most meaningful things we can do, and they teach us so much!
Our growth and learning is greatest when the comfort zone ends, and it can also be the most meaningful and joyful parts of our lives as well.
These are some of the main challenges. And they are real. And they are wonderful teachers.
An Invitation to You
This year, I invite you to do your own version of hard challenges. That can be whatever it means for you — training for a 5K or half marathon, meditating every day for 5 minutes, learning something, doing the meaningful work you’ve been avoiding.
Do these challenges in small doses — don’t try to overdo it. Give yourself compassion with whatever comes up. Get support, do it with others, and have fun with it.